Fangs Rule: A Girls Guide to Being a Vampire ebook | Amy Mah | 9781874192558

Hi my name is Amy, and I am a vampire. For those who do not know me, I should point out that I used to be a feral vamp, living in the outside world raised by humans, until I was discovered and adopted into Vampire society.

In the human world life was very difficult for me, I knew I needed blood but did not know how to get it, all I had was human books and films telling all kinds of stuff that was useless, like I can change into a bat, and that is so not true as I tried it and all it does is make you look stupid as you flap your arms up and down! And is the sort of thing which follows you about like a bad smell as you struggle to survive in a place where everyday could be your last as you face the living hell humans call High School.

I had hoped life would be better once I was taken in to vampire society, well being a vampire sounds like it should be a cool thing to be, like sleeping during the day and enjoying a night life with friends.

Huh …….. but no one warned me of the rules and that it also meant having to suffer Teenage hormones for like forever or until my new vampire family would let me grow up!. Being a vampire was not as much fun as I had hoped and the rules are just crazy like being told I have to walk about wearing a see through nightdress with no underwear, and believe me with my bust size that is so not going to happen, I have a hard enough time as it is trying to get a boyfriend without showing him what I don’t have!

To fill in the time between discovering where best to bite someone, to be able to climb a wall just using your finger nails and at the same time snarling at the guys below that are trying to look up you your nightdress, I decided to write A self help guide to help other teenage vampire girls, and I have called it Fangs Rule and it is written in an easy to follow A - Z format explaining everything a teenage vampire girl would need to know about living life as a modern Vampire.

What is fashionable to wear when eating out?

Fang maintenance & how to keep your claws sharp.

Easy to understand clear advice is given to every day problems

Example: When you get an urge to bite: We all get those normal urges to bite things, and I must point out it is very normal, Claws are all well and good in a fight but a bite gives the extra advantage of getting a refreshing drink at the same time. Lots of girls worry about showing their Fangs in public believing that to show your fangs is rude, but don't be shy they can be a girls greatest asset (ok second greatest asset) if a boy is being rude to you, don't just snarl at him, you bite him! You are a vampire, why do you think you have sharp teeth if not for biting.

The author Amy Mah (Vampire) is a well known blogger, that writes and blogs as a cynical teenage vampire:

Being a vampire sounds like it should be a cool thing to be as a teenage girl, like sleeping during the day and enjoying a night life with friends, huh, no one had warned me that it also meant having to suffer Teenage Hormones for so long! I am stuck as a teenager the years may pass but I am the same age! And as to the rules, so many rules, and vampire uniforms! Guys have long fancy cloaks that they are always tripping over and as to the Girls uniform, it is a 18th C Nightdress! The old male vampires expect a girl to walk about wearing just a see through nightdress with no underwear on!! as if that is ever going to happen!, they have seen far too many horror films! Life as a teenager is normally a living hell but even more so when you have fangs. The world is just out to get me, and not just by people trying to stake me because I have better teeth than they do!